a little late, but…

…some cute bunny illustrations are never out-of-date right?

Source

Happy belated Easter!

New fav mantra

During my two-week pranayama course at YT, we do a little chanting every day with Tiwariji. It’s so powerful when a room full of 40 or so people singing together; it literally touches your heart and vibrates within you. I’ve never been to a real kirtan before, but can only imagine the powerful energy it has when hundreds are singing together to celebrate life, the gods, and everything on Earth. I currently learned a new one and I couldn’t get it out of my head, called the Tvameva mantra (the first “v” is pronounced with a “w” sound):

Tvameva mata ca pita tvameva
Tvameva bandhusca sakha tvameva
Tvamevavidya dravinam tvameva
Tvameva sarvam mama deva deva

Thou art my mother, Thou art my father, Thou art my brother (or relative),
Thou art my friend, Thou art my knowledge, Thou art my wealth,
Thou art my all-in-all, O God of gods.

 

Back at YT — Tiwari Day 1, Detox Day 1

There’s something about Yoga Thailand that draws people back again and again. The friendly staff who remembers you even though your last visit may have been 8 months ago, the warm sun and humidity that never change, the semi-private beach resting in the rural parts of Koh Samui, the delicious vegetarian food, the yoga vibe, the great teachers…and oh, did I mention deadly mosquitoes?

what's NOT to love?

So here I am again, after my TT in June/July. I am back again, to my second home, as if nothing’s changed the past 8 months (well, they did build an extra beach shala to accomodate to growing number of visitors here). There are a few familiar faces too, three from my TT group, two who are here for Tiwari’s pranayama course, and one who officially works here now on the Wellness Team (they serve as advisors for people on the Detox). It feels good to be away from city life, it feels good to wake up to the sounds of crickets and birds (and waking up at 5am isn’t as hard), it feels good to be sweating like crazy on your mat in this humidity, and then have the sea wind blow your hair dry after your shower and while having your breakfast. It feels good to walk in flip-flops, and more often than not on your barefoot. It feels good to meet all these lovely yogis from around the world, hearing about how they fell in love with the practice and how it’s changed them. It feels good to be around people who doesn’t think you’re crazing for waking up at 5am every morning. It feels good to practice alongside these people, breathing, pranayama-ing, bending ourselves. It feels good to be away from baking for awhile, to allow my muscles to rest, and to just be by myself.

But, more about me later. Let’s talk about Sri O. P. Tiwari, teacher of pranayama, yoga therapy, philosophy, and student of Swami Kuvalayananda. He’s the teacher of my teacher.

The focus of this retreat is pranayama and Buddhist philosophy. Today he explained why philosophy even existed. Without philosophy, people wouldn’t know how to live, to achieve goals and see positive results. The society is not made for philosophy, rather a set of philosophical values are made to fit within the society. When one set of philosophy is outdated and is collapsing the society, a new one naturally arrives to regain order of the society. That is how Buddhism came in–a set of values of order over the ancient superstitions.

He then went on to talk about Divinity, how people are wrong when they try to achieve it. Because, we are all essentially divine, according to the Yoga Sutras. We are all created by the Divine, by Brahma. Everything we see, hear, touch, smell is divine. We are all like a diamond covered in dust or dirt, waiting to be cleaned and to sparkle. We just need a little more awareness, a little more understanding, a little less ignorance and misconception to find that Divine One within ourselves.

One student asked a question regarding ahimsa and the yogi vegetarian diet, as there are alot of debates whether ahimsa in the YS refers to purely vegetarian diet. Ultimately, Tiwariji, opened out his hands and chuckled, “I am very open.”

“You see,” he proceeded to explain, “everything has life.” So when we eat we are always taking something away, whether they be plants, vegetables, legumes, beef, fish, chicken, lamb, etc. In order to survive, you will never be able to live in 100% nonviolence. We should nevertheless “save the most, and kill the least.” When we eat, we should bring our awareness to our eating, “why do we eat?” Or why am I eating this right now? Am I hungry? Is the desire to eat coming from a physical need to consume this item for the wellbeing of my body? Or is it purely a mental desire? In other words, do not impose anything not coming from within. Each person needs a different diet, and vegetarian isn’t a one size fit all diet, so what we can do is experiment. Experiment eating different kinds of food and see how it affects your mind and body.

Here, Paul cut in and talked about his experience with vegetarianism. He was vegetarian for 3 years, simply because he had changed his way of thinking through yoga practices. But then one day, he started feeling the urge to eat some meat, and he did. He kept it up for 2 weeks and then his body started repelling it. No meat for him, he decided. So he tried fish, and that worked out fine, and in fact improved his wellbeing. Nonetheless, he always feels bad for eating fish, given the conditions fish are in now (overfishing, by-catch issues, etc.). To this, I strongly related to, because I had also been vegetarian for 3 years without much desire to eat any fish or meat. And then one day, I felt like my body needed that extra source of protein, and I started introducing fish back into my diet. It was causing suffering in my body and mental states (the craving!) for rejecting the fish, so eventually I gave in. I try to limit my fish-eating to once or twice a week though, because, as Paul said, I feel guilty.

So while I’m at YT, I figured I could try a detox. This is my first “real” detox under professional care, so I decided to keep it simple with the 5-day kitcheri detox. On top of that, I have to take a bajillion capsules, from triphala, to vitamin C, probiotics, Ayurveda herbs, etc., and drink detox juices, psyllium husk, juice with amino acids….All in all it’s been a good first day. I have had my first enema experience this morning (look it up if you dare, but don’t say I didn’t warn you!) which went quite successfully. Also had to test my body pH via sticking the pH paper in my pee. I also get lots of special treatments like massages and infrared sauna. And I still get to have my daily coconut juice (this is one of the other reasons I came back to YT for). I did, however, grabbed a little piece of raw cheesecake that was the dessert for dinner tonight to put in my fridge and save for 5 days later. Everybody’s been raving about the raw cheesecake that I just have to have it…in 5 days.

Shaking things up

Guess who came into our Mysore room yesterday?

This guy!

John Scott is here this week in Taipei, holding a 5-day immersion and a 2-day weekend workshop. My teacher invited him to pop into our Mysore class (my teacher has followed John for a long period now). And boy, was he a dynamic energy in the room!

I was in the front row corner, very concentrated in my practice (I swear I was!) when I heard man’s voice a few rows behind me. It wasn’t till a few minutes later that I realized it wasn’t my teacher’s voice. Actually, the accent gave it away. I sneaked a peak during my down dog (admit it, we all do that now and then), and lo’ and behold, there’s John Scott standing three rows behind, instructing students through the postures. And not just any ol’ way of instructing, but yelling (well, relative to the quiet whispers in the Mysore room) with a shake of humor and a tablespoonful of detailed guidance. Many students took one breath too many for their vinyasas to linger and smile at John’s method of teaching.

He worked his way around the room slowly, never rushing from student to student, giving each the utmost attention.

Third row. Second row.

I felt a tap on my shoulder just as I was going into Bhekasana.

“Hi, I’m John,” he put out his hand.

What a modest and humble guy! I’m sure everyone on that 16th floor at 7:40am knew who he was–probably had their hearts fluttering and their pranic forces rising like a roller coaster.

For those who knows John Scott or had read his book, you’d know that he is a believer of full vinyasas. And, apparently, he believes in knowing all the vinyasas of all the asanas.

John: So what are you working on right now?

Me: Um…(blank stare)…bhekasana.

John: Good, good. Right so, bhekasana, now how many vinyasas does it have?

Me: (Blink, blank stare, blink)…uhhh….

John: (smiling) Nine! It has nine!

Well, at least I knew the asana name.

He worked me up a sweaty mess through bhekasana, dhanurasana, laghu vajrasana, kapotasana, and bakasana (with full vinyasas of course, and testing me to see if I knew the vinyasa counts–I didn’t). All throughout, he was quick with the flow, never wasting a breath. A breath is a breath is a breath. No more, no less for each vinyasa. He dropped me into kapotasana so fast that it caught me by surprise, guiding my arms to directly grab my heels. In that instant I thought about my poor, inflammed back muscles. And then again by surprise, he lifted me up into a half handstand for dasa.

And then in up-dog I felt…nothing. Nothing in my back! The tension, the knots, the little pangs of soreness that made me wince ever so slightly that morning were significantly reduced. For the first time, I understood what many senior students of Pattabhi Jois say about him putting you in a stretch so deep that you didn’t even have time to think about it. Before you know it, you’re in the pose deeper than you could ever imagine, and it isn’t so bad after all. For the first time, I experienced the saying “Body not stiff, mind is stiff.” The more you think about a posture, the more fear you might built within you. What John did was he didn’t allow me to think at all. He put my body into the posture when it was most relaxed, when the brain didn’t yet have time to text my muscles, “Here comes kapotasana, watch out! It’s difficult!”

Just as subtle as he entered the Mysore room, John left an hour later to prepare for his workshop. Suddenly, the room was quiet, the energy flickered out. His visit brought a dynamic change of energy on what would be another monotonous Thursday morning. And my back would probably still hurt.

Reflection on yin yoga

This week has been quite an “interesting” week for me [insert: interesting as in suffering from slightly inflamed back muscles, coming down with a stomach flu, having mile-high orders for Pastry Pals, and on the verge of burning out]. I slodged through practice today, opting for Primary, and yet I found myself having to pause every now and then to regain some energy and to try to ignore my tensed back muscles. I’m pretty sure this fatigue is a combination of overbaking and just a bad practice week for me. My teacher even chuckled and teased me when he came over to adjust me in supta kurmasana (I could barely grasp my hands): “How are you feeling today? Light and flexible?”

this is how I've been feeling this week

I am literally burning out, and so I signed up for a Yin Yoga class after mysore today to “cool down.” After all, I need to balance my yang practice with some yin practice. I’ve only taken a couple of Yin Yoga classes before this, but have never really thought about the difference between yin yoga and restorative. Both use an ubiquitous amount of bolsters, blankets, and blocks. Both are held in dimly lit rooms with candles. Most postures are prone or supine, and held for a ridiculously long time.

But I think the class today was designed just for me.

The first thing our teacher said upon starting the class was about recharging ourselves via inward reflection and meditation. In our society today we are talking nonstop, whether by literally speaking, emailing, texting, writing, calling, etc…, we are always expressing ourselves. Not that it’s a bad thing, but the act of talking has a pitta nature, or a firey nature, if you will. It burns you out very quickly, and you have no control of where your energy goes. In contrast, the communication amongst the people living hundreds or thousands of years ago is more than a text away. Actually, they probably had to walk a couple of miles to see their neighbor. They had less distraction from technology, and they couldn’t do much after the sun had gone down. Thus, they had more time for self-reflection, to dwell within themselves, to observe and learn. They knew how to balance and contain their energy.

Meditation, my teacher said, serves as the container that can preserve our energy. Meditation is like the relief you feel when you finally got home in time to charge your iPhone or Android that ran dangerously low on battery from Whatsapping or playing too much Angry Birds during the day. Our sit bones are the adapters that connect us to the ground, drawing energy back into ourselves. If we learn how to maintain and polish this container, we are less likely to burn ourselves out, and we bring more focus into our daily tasks.

Recharge!

The rest of the class was spent on gentle but deep stretches, held for about 5 minutes each. The teacher emphasized on feeling our bodies in the pose, rather than putting our bodies there. Be with it, not go into it–a characteristic often glossed over in Ashtanga or any vinyasa-based yoga due to the fast-moving sequences.

Although I shamelessly admit I dozed off more than three times during the class (how did I manage to snooze during pigeon?!), I left the class somewhat more recharged than when I left the Mysore room that morning (I was drained). Definitely worth the time 2-3 times a week!

No coffee, no prana?

I had coffee before my practice for the first time today.

For some unknown reason, I felt like I was violating an unwritten law for doing so, despite the no coffee, no prana practices Guruji started that are now a morning routine for many Ashtangis. If Guruji said so, if hundreds of Ashtangis live by it, even a study that showed that caffeine can boost physical performance, what was I feeling guilty of?

To me, coffee is a treat I give myself when I go on those breakfast dates post-practice with my yoga lovers. It’s a delicious way to start my day after a relaxing Friday primary or an energized Sunday practice, accompanied by delightful yogi company. Otherwise, I rarely grab a cup of joe, unless I am really in a slump that day.

And today was one of those days.

I think the reason why I feel guilty of drinking coffee before practice is because I believe that practicing Ashtanga first thing in the morning is supposed to be the caffeine of your day, in a natural way, of course. And it’s a double-shot espresso if I have time for pranayama in the morning too. I even expressed my thoughts on Facebook one time: “who needs coffee in the morning when you got pranayama?” Needing external caffeine means that my body is out of balance, and I should find a natural, uncaffeinated way to restore the balance.

this is THE way to drink coffee!

Ashtangis are crazy. When my friends ask me what time I wake up, I’d tell them that they wouldn’t want to know. It’s a crazy o’clock, especially when some who are unemployed at the current moment wake up 6 or 7 hours after I do.Usually I don’t think too much about it, but this morning was one of those mornings when I dragged my body out of bed at the sound of my alarm feeling like the craziest person alive to be awake at that hour. I stumbled to the bathroom, my body still sore from practicing Intermediate the past couple days after 1.5 weeks of Primary only. I saw a lunatic with droopy eyes and disheveled in the mirror. I somehow managed to get myself out the door, into the chilly and wet morning, and onto the bus.

And then I had coffee, en route to the yoga studio and between bus and MRT subway transfers.

I noticed the difference immediately when I did my first sun salutation. I felt really light (the coffee did wonders to my bowel movement), and my mind alert to my breathing. Suddenly, the soreness in my back was gone (which I presumed was because the prana was flowing after the coffee, if speaking in Guruji terms). Even kapotasana was more of a piece of cake than yesterday, and dropbacks were great. Guruji was up to something when he said the famous “no coffee, no prana.”

Will I do this again tomorrow morning? Don’t think so. I blame the morning slump on too much baking the past few days due to mile-high orders, and getting less than 7 hours of sleep for 4 consecutive days.

This is also one of those weeks when I am counting down the days till Friday, but I think that is because I will be here for some warm sun, loving yogis, nourishing food, and, duh, some yoga and pranayama.

sunrise at Yoga Thailand, Koh Samui

 

“Freedom of mind” and “going from known to unknown”

Although I’ve only had minimal exposure to the world of Iyengar yoga, what little I learned during a one week workshop with Peter Scott opened my eyes the props can help anybody achieve the benefits of any asana.

I like this video clip because of what Dr. Geeta S. Iyengar said about backbending. Most find back bending difficult because we are reaching to the “unknown”–we cannot see where we’re going. Human beings like to live in our comfort zones, and back bends challenge that. Her talk on “freeing the mind” from bondages also reminds me of Pattabhi Jois’ famous line: “Body not stiff, mind is stiff.” We think we cannot do this or do that, but in fact, we are capable of more. Alot of people think they cannot do yoga because they are stiff, or not fit enough, but our body is made to be versatile and can be easily trained into what we believe we can do. Our mind is the ultimate barrier that we have to overcome.