Practice, and all is coming

As Ashtangis, we are always undergoing some sort of “sensations,” “soreness,” or, to put it on the extreme, “pains.” Any devoted yogi would know that yoga is an ongoing project that most likely cannot be completed in this life or the next. It is a slow-blossoming lotus, but you bet we will get there.

Over the past 6 years of my practice, I had struggled with “pains” and “injuries” and inhibited me from performing the full expression of certain asanas. The first “injury” being my hamstring attachments (near the sitting bones). It was a heal and re-injure, heal and re-injure, on and off, on and off process that dragged for 2.5 years. During that period, I was so frustrated, slightly depressed at times, afraid that I might never be able to do forward bends without flinching or having to bend my knees. I kept searching for answers, but none were satisfactory, until last June when I met Paul at Yoga Thailand for my TT. He was my healer–he taught me to engage my quads, more than I thought I needed to, when I do any type of straight-legged forward bends. It was all a matter of agonist/antagonist muscles: the more your quads work, the more relaxed my hamstrings can be. Within half a year, my hamstrings had healed completely. Sure, I still have some rare days when I feel tender around my sit bones area, but I would just remind myself to bring my awareness to my quad/hamstring actions. After 2.5 years of struggle, the answer came to me.

The second incident was my lower back. Having a slightly more flexible spine, I could easily drop back into urdhva dhanurasana from standing. But because of my flexibility, I forgot to fully engage my quads, psoas, and abs to protect my lower back from compressing. I thought it was “normal” to have lower back pains from doing backbends (a fool I was!) until my current teacher taught me how to safely do drop backs.

Urdhva Dhanurasana-wheel

Again, this was a one-year struggle for me, but again, the answer came my way when I least expected it. Now I can go deeper in my backbends than ever, and even kapotasana feel like less of a struggle.

Kapotasana-the king pigeon

The obstacles (asana-wise) seem to be never-ending, with one resolved and the next one just brimming over the horizon. My current struggle is a middle back pain, and just having sore/tight erector muscles. I strained a spot around my middle back while I was getting adjusted in Supta kurmasana, and now that I am entering the legs behind the head phases of the Intermediate series, my back gets no break.

Dwi pada sirsasana from the Intermediate series

I’ve been listening to my body, so I’ve been skipping out dwi pada and yoga nidra entirely for the past couple of weeks. It’s a relatively new struggle for me, but I don’t feel too bad about it, because I know the answer will come to me eventually. For now, I just need to surrender to it. Surrender to whatever greater Cosmic Force is out there, surrender to the workings of the Universe, and trust that in due time my answer will come. For now, this is my Isvara pranidhana. I’m just going to go with Pattabhi Jois’ “Practice, and all is coming” mantra. Because, hey, the Universe has solved my first two problems, and I trust that it will solve my third and all else that might come. If I trust and surrender, I will get there.

No coffee, no prana?

I had coffee before my practice for the first time today.

For some unknown reason, I felt like I was violating an unwritten law for doing so, despite the no coffee, no prana practices Guruji started that are now a morning routine for many Ashtangis. If Guruji said so, if hundreds of Ashtangis live by it, even a study that showed that caffeine can boost physical performance, what was I feeling guilty of?

To me, coffee is a treat I give myself when I go on those breakfast dates post-practice with my yoga lovers. It’s a delicious way to start my day after a relaxing Friday primary or an energized Sunday practice, accompanied by delightful yogi company. Otherwise, I rarely grab a cup of joe, unless I am really in a slump that day.

And today was one of those days.

I think the reason why I feel guilty of drinking coffee before practice is because I believe that practicing Ashtanga first thing in the morning is supposed to be the caffeine of your day, in a natural way, of course. And it’s a double-shot espresso if I have time for pranayama in the morning too. I even expressed my thoughts on Facebook one time: “who needs coffee in the morning when you got pranayama?” Needing external caffeine means that my body is out of balance, and I should find a natural, uncaffeinated way to restore the balance.

this is THE way to drink coffee!

Ashtangis are crazy. When my friends ask me what time I wake up, I’d tell them that they wouldn’t want to know. It’s a crazy o’clock, especially when some who are unemployed at the current moment wake up 6 or 7 hours after I do.Usually I don’t think too much about it, but this morning was one of those mornings when I dragged my body out of bed at the sound of my alarm feeling like the craziest person alive to be awake at that hour. I stumbled to the bathroom, my body still sore from practicing Intermediate the past couple days after 1.5 weeks of Primary only. I saw a lunatic with droopy eyes and disheveled in the mirror. I somehow managed to get myself out the door, into the chilly and wet morning, and onto the bus.

And then I had coffee, en route to the yoga studio and between bus and MRT subway transfers.

I noticed the difference immediately when I did my first sun salutation. I felt really light (the coffee did wonders to my bowel movement), and my mind alert to my breathing. Suddenly, the soreness in my back was gone (which I presumed was because the prana was flowing after the coffee, if speaking in Guruji terms). Even kapotasana was more of a piece of cake than yesterday, and dropbacks were great. Guruji was up to something when he said the famous “no coffee, no prana.”

Will I do this again tomorrow morning? Don’t think so. I blame the morning slump on too much baking the past few days due to mile-high orders, and getting less than 7 hours of sleep for 4 consecutive days.

This is also one of those weeks when I am counting down the days till Friday, but I think that is because I will be here for some warm sun, loving yogis, nourishing food, and, duh, some yoga and pranayama.

sunrise at Yoga Thailand, Koh Samui

 

“Freedom of mind” and “going from known to unknown”

Although I’ve only had minimal exposure to the world of Iyengar yoga, what little I learned during a one week workshop with Peter Scott opened my eyes the props can help anybody achieve the benefits of any asana.

I like this video clip because of what Dr. Geeta S. Iyengar said about backbending. Most find back bending difficult because we are reaching to the “unknown”–we cannot see where we’re going. Human beings like to live in our comfort zones, and back bends challenge that. Her talk on “freeing the mind” from bondages also reminds me of Pattabhi Jois’ famous line: “Body not stiff, mind is stiff.” We think we cannot do this or do that, but in fact, we are capable of more. Alot of people think they cannot do yoga because they are stiff, or not fit enough, but our body is made to be versatile and can be easily trained into what we believe we can do. Our mind is the ultimate barrier that we have to overcome.

Getting to know Guruji

Between practicing yoga, baking, tutoring, and teaching yoga, there is little time for leisurely reading during the day. I always look forward to the half hour to an hour before bed time, when I can submerge myself into fictional realms or absorb knowledge and be inspired by nonfictional books. Currently, I am reading Guruji by Guy Donahaye and Eddie Stern–a compilation of interviews of Sri K. Pattabhi Jois’ senior students.

I bought this book shortly after it was published in 2010, but never got the chance to read it till now. It’s a shame that I’ve never met this great man, and I never will, but each time I open this book I know a little more about this little man who was a yogi, a healer, a scholar, a teacher, a husband, a father, a grandfather, a great grandfather, and a guru to thousands across the world.

He was dedicated, always putting others before him, especially his students. Nothing brought him more joy than teaching and sharing this yoga. He was honest, childlike, and almost naive. He recognized students and people by their unique energies, not by their physical appearances. He believed in his students more than the students believed in themselves, thereby helping them achieve what they would not have dared dreamed of.

He was stern, but also got a sense of humor. He would make jokes with his poor English, which made them even funnier. Despite his fame, he was a humble man. He saw that his mission for this life was to pass on the teachings of his guru, Krishnamacharya, and to build a legacy of this ancient system of yoga.

I’m only about halfway through the book, but all his students revere him, love him, are grateful for him. The interviewees brought Guruji’s character to life, and I felt a piece of him inside this book.